What It’s Actually Like Dating a Millionaire Entrepreneur Pt 1.
From a girl who nearly lost herself trying to be the woman I thought he wanted
When I turned 24, I faced a tough reality.
I had always prided myself on being mature and accomplished for my age, but suddenly, I felt like just another 24-year-old, doing exactly what was expected at that age.
This realization was disappointing, especially as I was navigating a challenging relationship with my boyfriend, a successful entrepreneur in Miami.
My independence and usual confidence were shaken.
I’ve always valued independence in relationships and tended to hesitate to show any vulnerability.
However, my boyfriend and I shared a fearful-avoidant attachment style, which was a first for me.
I’d never been with someone who, like me, wanted a healthy, beautiful relationship, but became distant at the slightest thought of further commitment.
This was extremely unnerving for me and I began feeling like I was no longer in control because any attempt I made to get him to commit further to me didn’t go the way I was used to.
I felt incomplete and inadequate.
Our relationship hit a critical point at 18 months — the longest either of us had ever been in a relationship.
The contrast between my struggles and his flourishing life — he was 27, managing a multi-million dollar business, and living a lavish lifestyle in Miami — intensified my feelings of inadequacy.
For the first year and a half of our relationship, I was constantly crying.
I felt like I was on one of those water logs that wouldn’t stop spinning and I was doing everything I could to not fall as I wrestled with struggling to maintain my sense of independence while fighting to get him to like me more than I liked him.
I wish I could say there was an instant flip where things got better, but it was very very gradual.
I remember multiple journal entries where I would write “I’m feeling more like myself”.
I would go through old journals, pictures, and my memory box to remember the girl I used to be — blissful, artistic, joyful, care-free, lively, and in love with life.
Two years into our relationship, things slowly began feeling better. I felt like I was gaining my independence back — but then my boyfriend told me he was leaving for a trip to London for 8 days.
I went into panic mode again. What if he met a girl on the plane? What if he bumped into a gorgeous, successful girl at his hotel?
My brain went spiraling!
I flew back home to be with family while he was in London and I was a wreck. I cried every night. I felt so imbalanced again.
After that ordeal, I decided enough was enough. I was so sick of feeling like I needed him to be happy.
The next year and a half I decided to stop measuring myself against the woman I thought my boyfriend wanted to be with and started being myself.
I went out salsa dancing (before I’d never go out without my boyfriend because the thought of him going out without me would make me panic and/or I thought he respected me more because “I didn’t like to go out”.) I joined a run club. I joined a members club. I went on trips just with friends.
AND OH MY GOD. I reclaimed myself!
I stopped worrying and just did things that made me happy.
My mindset shifted to ‘I’m going to be me and if this is the woman he wants to be with, that’d be amazing, but if not, then he’s just not the one for me’.
You know what?
My boyfriend’s affection and respect for me grew as I embraced my true self.
He became obsessed with me.
It’s truly like a flip switched and he became the kind of man I felt safe with.
The dynamic changed — I stopped being needy so he had to do more for me to need him.
It no longer felt like a one-sided obsession — we’ve become obsessed with each other as I no longer rely on him for my sense of worthiness or happiness.
I learned about feminine and masculine energy and realized I had been operating from a very wounded feminine energy — I lacked boundaries and self-respect.
One of the most enticing things about a woman who embodies divine feminine energy is her lust for life and her ability to draw clear lines to protect herself.
I am now at a point, 3.5 years into our relationship, where I am madly in love with my boyfriend.
We reached a new level of mutual admiration and understanding. The two things I hear the most from him are “I love you” and “I live to serve you”…and let me tell you, this is a man who walks the talk.
Dating a successful, money-hungry, entrepreneurial man is not for the weak.
In the beginning, it will truly test your boundaries and your ability to stay grounded because if you’ve never dated a man who has high standards for his partner, it’ll be a shocking relief but also require you to do a lot of inner work.
Obviously, I wish I hadn’t lost myself so deeply, but hindsight is 20/20 and I realize now that that time in my life has allowed me to cherish my relationship with myself even more because I know what it feels like to lose it.
If you want to skip the mistake I made and attract a high-value man without losing your identity, join the Quietly Becoming Community.
Quietly Becoming a community of women who desire to be of the 1% in every area of their life while attracting a man who enhances their life rather than detracts from it.
To learn more, click this link.
Xx Lauren
