Why Women Test Men
A woman connected to her feminine energy does test the masculine, but not the way you’ve been taught.
If you’ve seen any sort of feminine energy content on social media, you’ve likely heard things like
“If your man doesn’t give you money to get your nails done he’s not taking care of you properly”
or
“If he doesn’t think of you as the first woman he can think of then he’s not dedicated to you”.
The problem with these kinds of tests is that, essentially, it’s a way for a woman to determine how she’s going to treat her man.
It’s saying “If he doesn’t do or respond the way I want him to, I’m going to be upset”.
Frankly, that’s playing games and it’s manipulative. A woman who does this is consciously deciding to measure a man against her idea of what a masculine man should do.
All that said, a woman grounded in healthy, healed feminine energy does test the masculine. However, it’s done subconsciously — not as a way to determine how she treats him, but as a way of determining how safe she feels with him.
In a previous article, I shared the qualities a High-Value Man has. Among those is a sense of protectiveness and integrity.
A feminine woman relaxes into herself and is easily able to fulfill her purpose when she feels taken care of.
I can’t explain why — but it’s a extremely common thing for a healed feminine woman to subconsciously test her man.
Let me explain a scenario I recently did this (and didn’t realize until I was writing this article and reflecting on my relationship that I realized I did this).
Recently, my boyfriend told me he planned on taking a solo trip to speak at a few events in Las Vegas and San Diego. It’s not common for us to take solo trips; he’s been head-down working for the last 3 months without seeing friends often so I understood.
However, I love San Diego and he knew I’d been wanting to go back since we moved from there 3 years ago.
Just last night, we were on the couch and I brought the trip up — telling him how much I was going to miss him and making small comments about him bringing me with him or at least me tagging along for just the San Diego portion of the trip.
The way the conversation ended was him telling me how much he was going to miss me but that he hadn’t gone on a solo trip in a long time and he wasn’t going to take me.
Ok, fine.
But — it actually was fine. It was so attractive to me that he told me he was going to do something for reasons that would only enhance his character and business and despite my plea, he assured me and stuck to his word.
Years ago, this would have triggered me. I would have felt abandoned or unloved because he knew I wanted to go to San Diego and he decided to go without me. I would have made my plea from a place of insecurity, knowing that if he refused to take me, I would be upset.
In this instance, I hadn’t previously decided to bring this up to him and determine my mood by how he responded. It was totally subconscious and I didn’t realize until after we had the conversation that it was a test of his integrity; was he going to give in because I asked or was he going to stick to what he told me from the beginning?
I also want to add that there is a lot more context I could give regarding the conversation — my boyfriend is an excellent communicator and we talked everything out in a way where we both felt heard, understood, and safe.
A healthy, high-value relationship that’s comprised of two people striving to fulfill their roles still are imperfect.
A grounded, feminine woman is constantly looking for signals she’s safe — similar to when you’re in the passenger seat of a car and you completely trust the driver, you’re aware of when they use the blinker, check to make sure it’s safe to switch lanes, doesn’t look at their phone, etc.
Please comment any questions you may have.
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To learn more, click this link.
Xx Lauren
